Sprouts

Messy, mysterious, all over the place…yep, this pretty much looks like our life right now. Those were the exact thoughts I had running through my head last weekend as I looked down upon the potatoes that we were preparing to put into the ground. For just as the potato is one, yet springs forth multiple sprouts, so it is with us during our current season of life. For while we are all working together as one family unit, we are all shooting off in so many different directions right now that many days it feels just like those sprouts…chaotic, unpredictable, and uncontainable.

The reality of the journey we are embarking on came full circle last weekend after a series of multiple setbacks which left me feeling defeated, disappointed, and dismayed. And while I’m completely certain that we are exactly where God wants us- some days it all seems like too much. What on earth are we thinking? Is this truly the best decision for our family? How am I going to balance motherhood, homeschooling, and be a sufficient helpmate to my husband in the midst of  tending multiple acres of crops, livestock, running a daily farm stand, juggling multiple Farmer’s Markets, and then, oh, yeah, there’s my dream of restoring the mill…wonder when that’s ever going to happen? These are the thoughts within my mind that have become the proverbial lyrics to the playlist of fear, frequently set on repeat.

Yet as I sat on the freshly tilled land last weekend, cutting off each individual potato sprout, God made it so clear to me that I was looking at all of this in the wrong way. For yes, while our life seems like it’s sprouting off uncontrollably,  He reminded me that each and every one of those sprouts has an essential purpose: new life. Life that can only be brought forth through Him when we trust His process and allow Him to take each convoluted facet of our life and turn the mess into the manifold.

And so today, I’m handing over my sprouts. I will offer up my sprout of limited capacity, trusting that He will prove limitless. I’m laying down my sprout of exhaustion, knowing that He invites me into rest. In faith, I will surrender my sprout of uncertainty, all the while staying close to the only One who remains certain. He is able, but we must be willing. Willing to allow ourselves to let go of the fear- to be taken completely apart- to be laid into the ground- to trust that new life is springing forth even when we can’t see what’s happening under the surface. He is the Master Gardener. The Tender of our Souls. The good that is sprouting forth.

Abide in Him Always,

Ashley